How to Move on from Someone Who Doesn't Like You
You've loved someone for quite sometime now, only to be rejected. Rather they said it or not, it still hurts. You're tired of being rejected and you love this person so much, you don't see how you could ever move on. Read on to find how!
Steps
- 1Cry, and cry a lot. Crying will get out all of your emotions instead of keeping them bottled up inside. Research shows that crying is a stress reliever and it actually makes you healthier. Although you probably won't feel better right away after crying, you will still get all of your emotions out on the table. Think about it. Let's say you're filling water up in a bathtub and your phone rings. You figure "it's taking forever to fill up, I'll just go talk to so and so for a moment and come right back." You talk on the phone for 10 minutes, forgetting all about the water you left running in the bathroom. By the time you're done on the phone and you enter the restroom, water has seeped everywhere and onto the floor. You run to turn it off, but by that time it's too late. That's what it is like if you don't cry. You will eventually explode and overflow with emotions. The best thing to do is get it all out. Don't be afraid of crying. If you feel more comfortable doing it in private, ask to be excused for a moment to use the restroom or go to your room. Find a good place for crying. Depending on how emotionally attached you were to this person, you'll probably be going to this special place specifically for crying a lot.
- 2Think about all the bad things about the person you loved and the negative consequences of going out with them. You might think this person has no flaws and they're perfect, but that's not true at all. The old saying really is true; nobody's perfect. Even something as little as them chewing with their mouth open will work. Try to make a list of everything you disliked about them and their flaws. Maybe they were rude to your best friend or they have horrible friends. Whatever it is, write it down and when you start feeling those old feelings creeping back, read the list. Also, try to think about any negative feelings there may be for going out with him/her. Would it ruin your family friendship because your parents think that person is wrong for you? Would it affect your grades/schoolwork or friendships? Is that person mentally unstable for you? Does that person bring you down a lot? These are some things to consider. If you begin thinking that he wasn't right for you anyway, you will no longer care if it works out or not.
- 3Get your mind off of him/her. Hanging out with friends, joining a club (ex: drama club, creative writing or book club, and online clubs) help a lot. Do anything to get your mind off of him/her. Write song lyrics or stories, do homework, hang out with friends at the mall, watching movies...all of these things work. Make sure that you're not thinking of him or her and there is absolutely no reason for you to encounter them or think about them. For example, if they work at the mall and your friends want to go there, don't go. Stay home and do something else. The whole point is to move on, and for most people who are in love, the moment they see their loved one again or the moment they start to communicate with them old feelings begin coming back. So make sure you won't be seeing them at all. Try to find a hobby you're interested in such as art, music, writing, books, dance, etc. You can also kill two birds with one stone by trying to get something good done while moving on, such as losing weight, studying or doing homework, practicing for a speech or playact, or earning money.
- 4Get away from everything that reminds you of them until you're over them. This means not going to places that you had experiences with them at, putting away old pictures where you won't be tempted to get them out until however long it takes you to get over them, and maybe even deleting their contact off your phone or off your friend's list on Facebook. It might seem rude, but you need to understand that you HAVE to move on in life. For example, if you're stopped at a red light and all the sudden it goes green, everyone else is going forward with their lives and you're just stuck. You will eventually get struck or fined for staying in the middle of the road. You can move, but it takes effort (putting your foot to the gas.) Move on. You do not want to be the person stuck at the red light any longer. So if seeing them on your home page on Facebook or seeing them on your contact phone list will bring back sudden memories or you will be tempted to contact them, you need to delete them. Also, if you own anything of there's, it might be a good time now to give it back to them if it holds memories.
- 5If you're ready, try to find someone new to love. You could meet this person in a bookstore or a coffee shop, online, or in the middle of the street. Never lose hope as to where you will find your one true love. It obviously didn't work out with you and the other person you once love(d), otherwise you wouldn't be here right now. If it didn't work out between you two, it wasn't meant to be. Everything happens for a reason in the great scheme of things. Know that better things are ahead for you, and be glad that your love story will be in the future and not in the past. Motivate yourself for the future and never give up on finding your true love, because he or she is out there somewhere.
- 6Get in the mindset that it's good that it happened, but everything has to end sometime. Be happy of the memories you shared with this person. There were probably good lessons learned. Don't wish it never happened-just wish to move on. Sometimes, moving on can be happy, too. You just have to see the good that this experience has shown you.
- 7Let go now of false hope. Somewhere in your mind, you're going to think "I can make them love me. Maybe they didn't mean that, they were just embarrassed. Maybe one day everything will work out." No. Let go of all of that. In order to move on, you need to know NOW that there is no hope for you guys. If he or she rejected you, they were probably being serious and keeping onto false hope is not going to help you whatsoever. Know that if they wanted you, they would come back to you. If they haven't already, you have to move on and let go of any false hope between the two of you. You can't make someone love you, and if you're thinking that, you might as well drop those thoughts. Everyone does it-you think it'll make you feel better. But in reality, it's really only making the situation worse because you're once again not moving on.
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